FEBRUARY2002

What can systems and child-serving agencies do to foster family empowerment? 

Recognize that all systems and child-servicing agencies have a culture and families won't know that culture on first contact with the agency. Therefore, from that very first contact, the most important thing a system or child-serving agency can do is focus on relationship building and cross-cultural training. The family is in the position of having to ask for services. Thus, the responsibility for initiating this cross-cultural training falls to the systems and child-serving agencies.

One articulate African-American mother replies to this question in this way:

"From the first contact, I look for mutual sharing. I tell my story and my provider listens. I expect my concerns to be validated. I expect that the provider will take the opportunity to share the culture and mission of the agency."

The mother continues, stating that if she shares her story about her son with the provider, she does not have the expectation that the provider will share a story, too. Rather, she expects to be validated by a response that helps her trust that there is congruity between the agency's mission and her needs. This congruity, she says, should be reflected in the services offered to her.

She tells the following story.

"My child is home-bound again from school. All I wanted in this current crisis was mental health support in the school setting. What I was offered was hours of family therapy, medication shifts, and individual child therapy -- all of which will have to be accessed by driving my child to a place he doesn't want to go to (the Mental Health Center) because of stigma. Meanwhile, he already suffers the stigma because he has been kicked out of school."

When asked how it feels to not get what you want when you ask for it, this mother had difficulty answering the question. When probed, she responded she had difficulty, ".because no one has ever asked me how I feel about services or treatment from the child-serving agencies."

This writer pressed the question and the mother responded: "It's demeaning and leaves me in the position of always being a victim. I initially came to get support and services for my child; I left feeling personally unsupported. In systems, no matter what agency it is, you are always seen as a professional/client relationship; doctor/client relationship; or, parent/professional relationship. What that relationship should be is a partnering between the parent and provider to identify and access supports that meet my entire family's needs. Without trust and a supportive relationship, my internal resources are depleted. I am disempowered to the point of becoming co-dependent upon the very agencies I went to for support."

When asked to explain what she means by "co-dependent", the mother responded, ".instead of them validating the fact that I knew what was best for my child and family, they suggested that they knew what was best without even knowing my child and family."

"I guess what most families do is realize that the means to an end is to accept everything they have to offer in the desperate hope that somehow things will work out. It is not a problem until they say it is a problem and I have to go through 6 months of their plan only to come in the end to the plan I suggested on my first visit."

"My son has a serious mental health condition but he is bright. Teachers don't understand mental health disorders. They see his "acting out" as negative behavior. What I want for him is a mental health specialist in the classroom with him. He can take an exam and have a panic attack, want to get up and leave the classroom. If he had a mental health professional who could walk him out, help him calm himself down, and let him take the test later, he could remain in school. Instead, I am called to pick him up because he is suspended for five days for walking out. Now he has two mental health diagnoses: Bipolar Disorder and Anxiety Disorder, and he is labeled a "bad kid" unable to control his "bad behavior". My child is Black, labeled, untreated and unsupported, and in the end, denied an education promised to him by law."

"My son has Bipolar Disorder and all I need if for him to be put in regular education with mental health supports. That's all I need."